Don't Judge Your Thoughts

In this post, I wrote about the importance of becoming conscious of our thoughts as we learn to manage our minds around getting organized. We have to know what we’re working with in order to make the changes needed to get the results we want. 

I told you about how I learned to be a keen observer of my own thoughts. 

But then something happened.  I became aware of a habit that is all-too-common, especially with women who are trying to juggle all the things – family, work, home, etc. 

Negative Thought Patterns 

I noticed repetitive patterns of thoughts I was having throughout the day.  In other words, thoughts that I was thinking over and over again – also called thought loops. 

But what alarmed me was how negative my thought patterns were. And I’m certainly not alone.  Many women find themselves, consciously or not, looping negative thoughts as they go about their days.  Our inner voices are not always kind. 

“It’s too hard.” 

“I’m too exhausted.” 

“I’m just disorganized.” 

“I’m always running late.” 

Sound familiar?  The crazy thing is, that once we become observers and notice these negative thoughts, we then judge ourselves negatively for having those thoughts!  It becomes a vicious circle. 

Be a Compassionate Observer  

The key to putting the kibosh on destructive thought loops is simple:  when you assume the position of watcher or observer, it must be from a place of compassion, fascination, and curiosity.   It never serves you to evaluate whether these thoughts are good or bad. 

When you judge your thoughts as bad, you’re just beating yourself up and when you beat yourself up, you are fighting against yourself, so you will lose every time.  Nothing good or productive will ever come from it. 

I love the saying, “you can’t hate yourself organized.”  That’s what judging yourself and your thoughts is all about.  How can you possibly get to a place you want to be, to get the results you want, if your thoughts, and judgment of them, are negative? 

So next time you forget to pay the cable bill and incur a late fee, instead of thinking to yourself, “I am so disorganized,” and then negatively judging yourself for that thought, you could just let your inner voice kindly observe the thought with compassion.  Gentle fascination is always a better facilitator for change.